Replacing Negative Self-talk

Just because you think something doesn’t make it true.

‘I’m sure he thinks I’m stupid.’

‘What if she doesn’t understand I won’t hurt her?’

‘I can’t do anything right. Why is it so easy for other people?’

In cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), the way you perceive situations influences the way you feel emotionally. In CBT, we would work to help you learn how to change your distorted unhelpful thoughts, core beliefs and attitudes.

These core beliefs arise from childhood experience, temperament and personality, as well as cultural factors. It can be helpful to understand how these beliefs originated, but in CBT it is not necessary to delve into the past to change your core beliefs.

You and I will be actively working together to address your cognitive distortions, those “automatic thoughts” that creep into your nights and days, and other unhealthy thinking patterns that cause distress or interfere with your life.

In CBT, clients work to identify and develop alternative ways of thinking not only to feel better, but to change their behavior.

CBT is more focused on the present, more time-limited, and on problem-solving. In therapy, you will learn skills that help identify distorted thinking, modify beliefs, relating to others in different ways, and changing your behavior.

What you think determines how you feel and behave.

In CBT, automatic thoughts and maladaptive behavior that result from them are the cause of psychological problems. Symptoms and psychological distress can be reduced by changing the way we think about a situation.

If you think that you are not “lovable,” this will affect your behavior. You might expect rejection or be reluctant to form relationships, not to mention how it affects your self-esteem!

CBT identifies these automatic core beliefs and challenges the validity of them, so they are not running your life.

What if the negative thoughts you have are false?

These cognitive distortions, or core beliefs, can be rooted in abandonment issues – “People I love will abandon me.” Or perhaps they are rooted in defectiveness issues, “I am not good enough.” Or unlovable issues, “I am not lovable.” Or entitlement issues, “I deserve a lot of praise and attention all the time.” And, also, Caretaking/responsibility issues, “My needs are not important.”

These core beliefs can underlie our automatic thoughts. In CBT, these automatic thoughts are identified and challenged, so you can change the way you feel and transform your life.

I would love the chance to work with you to eliminate your negative self-talk.

Call me at (415) 888-8084 to set up a 15-minute phone consultation to discuss working with me or fill out the contact form below.